Friday, September 11, 2009

Dolphins Game 4

Game 4 was a disappointing game for the Dolphins. We ended up losing 0-20 to the Raiders. The boys were discouraged, but did have a good practice last night and are looking forward to next week's game 5. Here's hoping for a rebound :-)
COACHES and PARENTS:
I am having an issue with football "punishments" can any of you help me out?
What is more important, making the kids do extra long work outs when they lose or the kids learning the art of losing as well as winning?
What should you do as a parent if you feel your child is not getting the opportunities you feel he/she deserves when playing a sport?
Thanks for your input!
I look forward to hearing your comments!

1 comment:

Dane said...

My 2 cents:
Punishments for losing, such as extra long workouts for kids Taylor’s age, are ridiculous. I agree with your comment, “Learn the art of losing.” Certainly the coach can make modifications in practice, talk to kids about specifics, etc, but punishment for losing is detrimental, not helpful. If we were talking about, say, a college or pro team losing because of lack of effort, that would be another story, but we’re not. It is important for kids Taylor’s age to learn the game and learn to love the game. This includes losing and how one responds to losing. It is all a part of it.

The second question is much more difficult to answer. First of all, it is unbelievable to me that Taylor would be having playing time issues. He is a natural athlete, a natural leader, and he has all the confidence in the world.

As a parent, the best thing to do is to talk to the coach and address directly your concerns. The problem is, this may or may not work, depending on the coach. That doesn’t change the fact that the first step is approaching the coach. I know from experience, a coach can be unaware of such things and maybe he just needs to know what a player and his parents are feeling.

I had a similar issue. The coach had picked his QB and running backs before the season began. They were all the assistant coach’s kids, and they were all related. That’s fine, if other kids get a chance during practice. They didn’t. By the third game, there were no changes, when it was obvious that other kids were better. I talked with the coach and he was stubborn. It became heated. I told him that since he was still playing the exact same kids that he had chosen before the season began, and they were not performing, that maybe he should question if he was missing something and try different kids in different positions. It didn’t help. He had his good ol’ boys club and nobody was breaking in.

Coaches want to win, and kids want to win, that’s the goal of a game. But at this stage, if a coach is too focused on winning, he is doing it solely for personal pride. He gains nothing else. Sometimes his quest for personal pride comes at a cost to the kids. Once a kid gets into high school and above, it is different. The coach MUST win. He is playing for his job, but at this age, priorities are different.


As a coach, I approach it the way I mentioned above. Teach the kids to learn the game and learn to love the game. This includes structuring it so that kids are having fun, feeling involved, and feeling responsible. This means that all kids play. At the end of the season, if a kid experiences what makes sports great, such as teamwork, sacrifice, going above expectations, and coming through when others are counting on you, then that is success.

Sorry for rambling. That was more like 2 dollars, not 2 cents.